CHRISTIAN MARRIAGE.

                             Keith Gerner.

                  AUDIO VISUAL MINISTRIES, P.O.Box 1

                 NEWCASTLE, Co Down, N.Ireland. BT33

                                 ***

                  Lesson No.12. FINANCIAL MANAGEMENT

                          Proverbs 31:10‑25

 

   One of the root causes for breakup in Marriage is the failure of the financial management of the home, especially as the family becomes older.

(i)     In Great Britain, one in three of first marriages end in Divorce because of this pressure, and one in five breadwinners in British households, are women, because of increasing financial stress.

(ii)    With the trend to early marriage and an average life expectancy for women of 75, child caring years are over by age 35,  leaving 40 years to be filled with new interests)

(iii)   Over 40% of British labour are women (1978 = 9.3 million) of whom 64% are married. (In 1978 2m British women were working full time with children under 16 and 3.5 m. were working part time.) One in four managers are women, and business therefore plays an increasing part in the family, for both husband and wife alike.

(iv)    What guidelines are given in the WORD OF GOD FOR MANAGING THE HOME ?

  (a) STRONG CHARACTER IS NEEDED 

  Prov 31:10 A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far

             more than rubies. (NIV)

  (Modern Language) "Who can find a wife with strength of character ?

  She is far more precious than jewels..."

  (1) Good financial management REQUIRES DISCIPLINEE

  (2) HUSBANDS should realise they have WORK TO DO IN THE HOME, if

  they wish to avoid paying for help or machines.

  (3) Draw up a list of hours for each partner in shopping, meals

  (preparation, cooking, clearing up) clothes, floor care, furniture

  care, cleaning bathrooms, making beds, general tidying, car care,

  domestic maintenance for the boiler and garden machinery.

  (4) Use Saturdays or weekends for BULK COOKING and save a list of

  priorities for each day in the shopping

  (5) Agree together on INCOME  coming into the home, and BUDGET what

  you are able to afford

  (6) LIST YOUR REGULAR OVERHEAD EXPENSES (eg Rent, rates, light and

  heat bills) and KEEP A NOTE OF YOUR FOOD EXPENSES.

  A typical cash Notebook for accounts should contain columns for

  INCOME and EXPENSES.

  (7) NEVER GO INTO HIRE PURCHASE AGREEMENTS WITHOUT first working out

  WHAT YOU ARE ABLE TO AFFORD.

  Romans 13:8 Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing

              debt to love one another, for he who loves his fellowman

              has fulfilled the law. (NIV)

  (8) TITHE ON YOUR TOTAL INCOME AS A FIRST PRIORITY

  Mal 3:8 "Will a man rob God? Yet you rob me. "But you ask, `How do

          we rob you?' "In tithes and offerings. (NIV)  


 

  (b) SECURITY LIES IN TRUST

  Prov 31:11 Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing

             of value. (NIV)

  (Living Bible "Her husband can trust her..")

  (1) JOINT DECISIONS should be made, and while each partner may

  allow a certain amount for PERSONAL SPENDING, try to AVOID BUYING ON

  IMPULSE without forethought and prayer

  (2) By working things out together in Britain, you can also benefit

  from TAX. (eg Some amounts that the wife earns are not taxed and is

  therefore more profitable than the husband doing over time) Part

  time work here is defined as taking up less than 30 hours per week,

  and you can do a job from 10 am to 4 pm. on 5 days a week and still

  qualify for tax relief. IT PAYS TO WORK THINGS OUT TOGETHER.

  Prov 25:24 Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house

             with a quarrelsome wife. (NIV)

  (c) SPEND TIME IN EARNING AT HOME

  Prov 31:13 She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands.

             (NIV)

  (1) Mother can remain at home and earn a living, while looking after

  the family  She can open her home and work from her house.

  (2) Work available includes Travel business, public relations,

  typing and office work from a fax machine, design and fashion work,

  crafts etc. can all be done, given the right tools.

  (3) MINDING CHILDREN for others is an alternative calling, but here

  in dealing with enquiries for your service, remember to:

  (i) Give reliable replies and costings, WHICH YOU HAVE WORKED OUT

  IN ADVANCE

  (ii) ORGANISE AN OFFICE AREA IN YOUR HOME, keeping accounts, bills

  and stationery available. KNOW WHERE THINGS CAN BE FOUND in an

  emergency

  Joshua 2:6 (But she had taken them up to the roof and hidden them

             under the stalks of flax she had laid out on the roof.)

  (iii) If you have an answering machine on your telephone while you

  are out, do not take out too long a rental contract and keep a

  separate phone for PERSONAL CALLS. DO NOT USE CHILDREN TO REPLY TO

  BUSINESS CALLS

  (4)  BE RELIABLE IN WHATEVER PROMISES YOU MAKE TO DO JOBS

  Psalms 15:4 who despises a vile man but honours those who fear the

              LORD, who keeps his oath even when it hurts, (NIV) 


 

  (5) BE CAREFUL OF ANY HIDDEN REQUESTS FOR MONEY FROM A PROSPECTIVE

  EMPLOYER (EG OBLIGATORY PURCHASE OF A KNITTING MACHINE OR A SPECIAL

  TYPEWRITER) AVOID PIECE WORK OR COMMISSION‑BASED SCHEMES, when

  selling catalogue goods to others. Such firms are USING YOU, and for

  younger women, their priority must be the children:

  1 Tim 5:14 So I counsel younger widows to marry, to have children,

             to manage their homes and to give the enemy no

             opportunity for slander. (NIV)

  (i) Organisations which use you to sell cosmetics, etc. may appear to

  give you money, but you need to COST OUT the extra driving or telephone

  calls, to do these jobs.

  (ii) There are easier ways to do this work by bringing people to

  your home, provided you work this out with your husband.

  Titus 2:5 to be self‑controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be

            kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one

            will malign the word of God. (NIV)

  (6) BE CAREFUL OF CONTRACTS WHICH YOU SIGN. You may need legal

  advice on this.

  (7) If you want jobs and lack the educational qualifications, then

  CONTACT THE FIRM DIRECTLY by phone or letter, giving nationality,

  date and place of birth, address and qualifications obtained with

  positions held in the past. SELL YOUR PERSONALITY. 


 

  (D) SELL YOURSELF. 

  Prov 31:18 She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp

             does not go out at night. (NIV)

  MISTAKES MOST COMMONLY MADE BY WOMEN, WHEN CONSIDERING WORK, ARE: 

  (i) After having children, they assume they will never work again

  and FAIL TO KEEP IN TOUCH WITH JOB SKILLS.

  (ii) THE FAMILY ATTITUDE TO THE WOMAN, SHOULD NEVER SHATTER HER

  CONFIDENCE IN HER OWN ABILITIES. A condescending or tolerant

  attitude to her, can crush her confidence and make her underestimate

  her talents and abilities, when seeking work.

  (iii) A woman that RULES THE HOME and is not submissive to her

  husband, thinks she is always right AND NOBODY CAN CONTRADICT HER.

  She will not fit into other people's established work pattern and

  wants to do everything her own way.  There must be a period of

  seeing how the system works, before she can lay down the law to

  others in her new employment.  This proud attitude can militate

  against her getting a job.

  Prov 11:2 When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility

            comes wisdom. (NIV)

  Prov 16:18 Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a

             fall. (NIV)

(iv) A woman who TREATS TEENAGERS in the office LIKE CHILDREN, because

  they are not much older than her own, is also heading for trouble.

1 Tim 5:2  (treat)...... younger women as sisters....

 (v) GOING TO CLASSES AND SUBJECTING ONESELF TO THE DISCIPLINE OF

  WORKING WITH OTHERS, IS VITAL FOR A WIFE WHO HAS BEEN ON HER OWN IN

  HOME.  Otherwise she will lack the necessary training for a job.

  Prov 10:17 He who heeds discipline shows the way to life, but

             whoever ignores correction leads others astray. (NIV)

  Prov 12:1 Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates

            correction is stupid. (NIV)

(vi) GET A DEFINITE AIM IN YOUR WORK AND STICK TO IT.

  Do not miss the best jobs by lack of aim. Once in a job, do not

  always be taking time off to take children to the doctor, etc. KEEP

  A SINGLE EYE ON YOUR WORK

  Matt 6:22 "The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are good,

            your whole body will be full of light. (NIV)

(vii) OVER ATTENTION TO DETAIL and LACK OF ABILITY TO COMPROMISE, so

  that the woman does not make allowance for others, will prejudice

  her work chances.  Patiently learn to go forward

  2 Cor 12:12 The things that mark an apostle‑‑ signs, wonders and

              miracles‑‑ were done among you with great perseverance.

(In Britain, under the Trained Opportunities Scheme (TOPS), women are

  able to choose their own course of training to last at least 4

  weeks, no longer than a year, to train for employment.  As well as

  FREE training, TOPS provides a generous weekly cash allowance up to £4,000 pa, including travelling costs. This allowance from £25 to

£ 70 a week, is also TAX FREE) At the end of this scheme, you  do not  have to take a job. 


 

  (e) SEEKING BARGAINS 

  Prov 31:18 She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp

             does not go out at night. (NIV)

  (Living Bible "She shops for bargains...")

  (i) It pays to shop around, if you can spare the time, as

  comparison of prices will show the same goods at different prices

  in different shops.

  (ii) The wife may even save by MANUFACTURING YOUR OWN CLOTHES

  Prov 31:13 She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands.

             (NIV)

  (iii) OXFAM and Charity shops are a handy alternative for shopping,

  especially if there are growing children

  (iv) If you purchase anything new, the wife should make sure you have the money to  pay for it from her own earnings, so that there are not continual  rows in the home about her purchases, because the husband's earnings   have not been budgeted for those needs.

  Prov 31:14 She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from

             afar. (NIV)

  Prov 31:16 She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings

             she plants a vineyard. (NIV)

  Prov 31:18 She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp

             does not go out at night. (NIV)

  Prov 31:24 She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the

             merchants with sashes. (NIV)

  (v) The good family also shares their cast‑off clothes with others

  Prov 31:20 She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to

             the needy. (NIV)

  In turn, they are able to help with their own surpluses

  (vi) HOUSE FURNISHINGS can be done from Government DESIGN CENTRES.

  For less than £2 in Britain, these provide books for basic home

  decorating and planning.

  Prov 31:22 She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine

             linen and purple. (NIV)

  (vii) FAULTY PRODUCTS, where the shop will not admit liability,

  should be taken to the local CITIZENS ADVICE BUREAU

  Warnings about purchase of products is also available in WHICH

  Magazine from the British CONSUMERS ASSOCIATION, 14 Buckingham St,

  LONDON.

  (viii) The ELECTRICAL ASSOCIATION FOR WOMEN (25 Founders Place,

  London) is an independent voluntary organisation, which gives

  information and advice on most kinds of electrical equipment,

  especially in England on BEAB approved appliances.  They also run

  one day Courses on how to do jobs and save energy. (Cost is about £2

  including a snack lunch)

  (iv) "SUPERWOMAN" and "SUPERWOMAN IN ACTION" by Shirley Conran

  (Penguin Books)  cost only a couple of pounds, and give shopping

  lists of speciality firms and DO IT YOURSELF jobs.


 

  (f) STRONG PLANNING 

  Prov 31:25 She is clothed with strength ....... she can laugh

             at the days to come. (NIV)

  (i) ADEQUATE PLANNING FOR THE DAY and a definite meal programme, can

  AVOID COSTLY EATING OUT (especially fish and chips or packaged

  meals)

  (ii) Be prepared to SAY "NO" TO DISTRACTIONS THAT COME UP, since

  they will increase your time and expenses on planned jobs.

  Matt 5:37 But let your communication be, Yea, yea; Nay, nay: for

            whatsoever is more than these cometh of evil. (KJV)

WASTING TIME IS WASTING MONEY       

  (iii) PLAN YOUR BUDGET AND ACCOUNTS by keeping adequate books,

  headed RECEIPTS/ EXPENSES. Keep a WEEKLY BALANCE and carry the

  surplus to the following week. A LIST OF THESE EXPENSES will show

  where the bulk of the money is going. Headings could include:

  Coal, Electricity, Oil, Meat, Vegetables, etc.

  By involving husband and wife in jobs, this will give a clear guide

  where savings are possible, when extra money comes for capital

  investment. (eg DEEP FREEZE for meats, micro wave

  ovens for cooking costs) BALANCED PLANNING can save much argument,

  but let it include GIVING TO GOD which always leads to further

  blessing from the Lord, and so budget time and money to serve Him.

  Acts 20:35 In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of

             hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words

             the Lord Jesus himself said: `It is more blessed to give

             than to receive.'" (NIV)


                        CHRISTIAN MARRIAGE

                   FINANCIAL MANAGEMENT

                        Proverbs 31:10‑25

                               ***

(a) STRONG CHARACTER NEEDED.V.10

(1) DISCIPLINE NEEDED

(2) Husbands help in home

(3) Hours lists for each partner

(4) Bulk cooking at weekends

(5) Budget on known income

(6) List overhead expenses & keep note of food expenses

(7) Only go into hire purchase agreements for affordable items.

(8) Tithe = First priority.Mal 3:8

(b) SECURITY LIES IN TRUST.v.11

(1) Joint decisions made

(2) Tax Benefits from joint plans

(c) EARN AT HOME.v.13

(1) Mother works from her house

(2) Work available with new office machinery

(3) CHILD MINDING (i) Advance costings

                    (ii) Organised office area

                   (iii) Special phone for business calls

(4) RELIABILITY essential in job promises.

(5) WATCH HIDDEN MONEY COSTS from prospective employers

             (i) Cost out sales jobs

            (ii) Bring people to home if husband                   approves..Tit.2:5

(6) Be careful SIGNING CONTRACTS

(7) SELL YOUR PERSONALITY TO FIRMS CONTRACTING YOU.

(d) SELL YOURSELF.V.18. Mistakes commonly made by women:

(i) Failure to be in touch with job skills (ii) Wrong family attitude to women

(iii) Proud women not welcome in jobs.Prov 11:2

(iv) Treat office teenagers with respect. 1 Tim 5:2

(v) Go to classes & subject to discipline is vital training.

(vi) Get aim in work and stick to it.Matt 6:22

(vii) See broad picture & be prepared to compromise.Patience!

(e) SEEKING BARGAINS.v.18

(i) It pays to shop around    (ii) Manufacture own clothes

(iii) Charity shops bargains(iv) Buy new clothes with own money .Prov 31:14‑24

(v) Share cast‑offs.Prov 31:20(vi)FURNISH from Government design centres

(vii)Citizens Advice bureaux for faulty buys.(viii) Use ELECTRICAL ASSOCIATION FOR WOMEN  (iv) READ "SUPERWOMAN" and " SUPERWOMAN IN ACTION".S.CONRAN

(f) STRONG PLANNING.v.25

(i) Adequate daily planning avoids costly eating out

(ii) Deny distractions.Matt 5:37.Do not waste time

(iii) Keep adequate books.Acts 20:35